Wedding Invitation Ettiquette

How to address invitations: When addressing invitations, both names of a married couple should be on the envelope. Both names should also be included if a couple is living together or for same-sex couples. If you have the time it’s really nice and much appreciated by your guests if you include directions, maps, and lodging information, especially for those coming in from out of town. Some helpful suggestions:

  • Always be sure to order extra invitations, you may want a copy for yourself, or a family member may want one for a keepsake.
  • Allow yourself lots of time and keep track of all responses. Caterer’s will want a final headcount a week or two in advance.
  • Check the weight of your invitations before you mail them. Otherwise they may be returned for insufficient postage.
  • Be sure to use the correct spelling of guests names and their titles, and if at all possible always include the names of your guests dates.
  • Never include registry or gift information, it is tacky and considered poor taste. Instead have your family and close friends spread the word.
  • Do not include the words “No Gifts.” Family members should share the news with your guests.
  • It is impolite to say “Adults Only” or “No Children.” Your guests will know who has been invited by the names written on the envelope.
  • Try not to use labels on envelopes. It is always much nicer to hand-address your envelopes, even if you are sending out several hundred invitations. If you want your invitations to look more formal, you can also hire a professional calligrapher to address them instead.

When should I send out my invitations? You should always send out your invitations no later than eight weeks before your wedding. If you have them ready earlier, send them out. Out of town guests will appreciate the extra notice, so they can book time off work and make arrangements. Never send out invitations last minute, it will make them feel like they were an after thought. They will be offended, and probably wont come either way.
Can I email invitations or use an e-vite program? It is never okay to send an invitation through email. Even if its to a close family friend or relative, it’s inappropriate. The only time its ever okay is if the wedding is last minute or rushed, (i.e.: due to grandma’s rapidly failing health, etc.) and even then a personal phone call is always best.